What To Expect
Once client onboarding documents have been executed, we will set a usually agreeable time to mediate via Zoom, the online platform. You can log on from the comfort of your home or office.
When we meet, through carefully guided discussions with equal time and attention to both parties, I will help you to craft an agreement that reflects both parties' interests, needs and concerns - and one that all parties can accept.
Along the way, we have the chance to address feelings and concerns that may be preventing you from reaching agreement. I strive to ensure that you have a safe place to come to a final agreement.
When we meet, through carefully guided discussions with equal time and attention to both parties, I will help you to craft an agreement that reflects both parties' interests, needs and concerns - and one that all parties can accept.
Along the way, we have the chance to address feelings and concerns that may be preventing you from reaching agreement. I strive to ensure that you have a safe place to come to a final agreement.
My Style of Mediation
As a mediator, my objective is to assist you in reaching a mutually acceptable agreement while addressing any emotional obstacles that may hinder this process. I provide a secure environment where you can finalize your agreement. My mediation style incorporates both facilitative and transformative techniques. In the facilitative approach, I encourage you to voice your concerns and interests, leading to a mutually satisfying resolution. In the transformative approach, I help you gain insight into each other's perspectives, uncover hidden concerns, and enhance communication to prevent or manage future conflicts.
Mediation As
Empowerment
Mediation is a process that should not be confused with compromise. To compromise is to reach an agreement by mutual concession, which can sometimes result in making a shameful or disreputable concession. On the other hand, mediation is a process that empowers you to take control of your destiny and achieve a peaceful resolution.
It is true that in some cases, parties may choose to compromise during a mediation. However, this is not the only way to achieve a successful resolution. Mediation provides an opportunity for parties to openly and honestly communicate their interests, needs, and concerns, and work together to find mutually agreeable solutions.
In mediation, parties are encouraged to collaborate and find common ground, without sacrificing their individual interests or values. The mediator acts as a neutral third party who facilitates communication, helps parties explore options, and guides them towards a resolution that is satisfactory to all. In conclusion, it is important to recognize that mediation is not compromise, but rather a powerful tool that can help you achieve a resolution that is fair, equitable, and tailored to your unique needs and interests.
It is true that in some cases, parties may choose to compromise during a mediation. However, this is not the only way to achieve a successful resolution. Mediation provides an opportunity for parties to openly and honestly communicate their interests, needs, and concerns, and work together to find mutually agreeable solutions.
In mediation, parties are encouraged to collaborate and find common ground, without sacrificing their individual interests or values. The mediator acts as a neutral third party who facilitates communication, helps parties explore options, and guides them towards a resolution that is satisfactory to all. In conclusion, it is important to recognize that mediation is not compromise, but rather a powerful tool that can help you achieve a resolution that is fair, equitable, and tailored to your unique needs and interests.
On Apologies
A Few Thoughts About Apology
Apology is a powerful tool in resolving conflicts, and as a mediator with years of experience, I have found that it can be the key to bringing parties together and finding a resolution. Whether the conflict involves trees, real estate, divorce, or other matters, a simple “I’m sorry” can go a long way in repairing a strained relationship. In this article, I will explore the nuances of apologies and offer some thoughts on how to make them more effective. Specifically, I will focus on the words “I’m sorry,” the contraction “but,” and the concept of accepting responsibility.
The Power of “I’m Sorry”
Saying “I’m sorry” is a powerful first step in making amends for a wrong. However, simply mouthing the words is not enough to resolve a conflict. It is essential to convey genuine remorse through body language and tone of voice. For example, the statement “I’m sorry that I yelled at you and hurt you. I was unkind and thinking only of myself” is much more effective than a simple “I’m sorry” if delivered with appropriate non-verbal elements.
The Danger of “But”
The word “but” can negate the power of an apology. When used in an apology, it suggests that there is a justification for the behavior or that the other party is partly to blame. For example, “I’m sorry I yelled at you, but you make me so frustrated with your whining and complaining” is not a real apology. It shifts the blame to the other party and does not acknowledge the wrong that was done. Avoid using “but” in an apology if possible.
The Importance of Accepting Responsibility
Accepting responsibility is essential in making an effective apology. Admitting fault is not easy, but it is necessary to move forward and make amends. The phrase “I was wrong” is one of the most powerful ways to accept responsibility and begin the process of making things right. For example, “I’m sorry that I yelled at you. I was wrong to blame you for the late delivery. I was only thinking of how it was going to affect me and took out my frustration on you” is a powerful apology because it accepts responsibility for the wrong that was done.
In Conclusion
Apologies are a critical tool in resolving conflicts. A sincere “I’m sorry” can go a long way in repairing a strained relationship. Avoid using the word “but” in an apology, as it can negate the power of the statement. Finally, accepting responsibility is essential in making an effective apology. By using explicit language and appropriate non-verbal elements, you can make your apology more powerful and begin the process of making things right. As the English proverb goes, “Anger is often more harmful than the injury that caused it.”
By apologizing sincerely, we can begin to heal the wounds caused by conflict and move forward with a renewed sense of understanding and compassion.
Apology is a powerful tool in resolving conflicts, and as a mediator with years of experience, I have found that it can be the key to bringing parties together and finding a resolution. Whether the conflict involves trees, real estate, divorce, or other matters, a simple “I’m sorry” can go a long way in repairing a strained relationship. In this article, I will explore the nuances of apologies and offer some thoughts on how to make them more effective. Specifically, I will focus on the words “I’m sorry,” the contraction “but,” and the concept of accepting responsibility.
The Power of “I’m Sorry”
Saying “I’m sorry” is a powerful first step in making amends for a wrong. However, simply mouthing the words is not enough to resolve a conflict. It is essential to convey genuine remorse through body language and tone of voice. For example, the statement “I’m sorry that I yelled at you and hurt you. I was unkind and thinking only of myself” is much more effective than a simple “I’m sorry” if delivered with appropriate non-verbal elements.
The Danger of “But”
The word “but” can negate the power of an apology. When used in an apology, it suggests that there is a justification for the behavior or that the other party is partly to blame. For example, “I’m sorry I yelled at you, but you make me so frustrated with your whining and complaining” is not a real apology. It shifts the blame to the other party and does not acknowledge the wrong that was done. Avoid using “but” in an apology if possible.
The Importance of Accepting Responsibility
Accepting responsibility is essential in making an effective apology. Admitting fault is not easy, but it is necessary to move forward and make amends. The phrase “I was wrong” is one of the most powerful ways to accept responsibility and begin the process of making things right. For example, “I’m sorry that I yelled at you. I was wrong to blame you for the late delivery. I was only thinking of how it was going to affect me and took out my frustration on you” is a powerful apology because it accepts responsibility for the wrong that was done.
In Conclusion
Apologies are a critical tool in resolving conflicts. A sincere “I’m sorry” can go a long way in repairing a strained relationship. Avoid using the word “but” in an apology, as it can negate the power of the statement. Finally, accepting responsibility is essential in making an effective apology. By using explicit language and appropriate non-verbal elements, you can make your apology more powerful and begin the process of making things right. As the English proverb goes, “Anger is often more harmful than the injury that caused it.”
By apologizing sincerely, we can begin to heal the wounds caused by conflict and move forward with a renewed sense of understanding and compassion.